First, did you see this article about the jerk pastor who was so incensed by a restaurant's policy to add an 18% tip to large parties that he scratched out the tip, left nothing, and wrote in the following:
|He's filled with the love of Christ.|
Then there were articles about the "Super Bowl Chicken Wing Apocalypse." Apparently two men stole 26,000 pounds of chicken wings and the National Chicken Council reported a 1% drop in chicken production. Oh lawd, it's the perfect storm! Super Bowl wing prices will spike which will lead to unhappy sports fans which will lead to...the end of the world?
|Crap. I'll never get out of them.|
Calm down and put down the paper bag you're breathing into. Apparently the news was blown out of proportion and there will be enough wings for everyone. I'm still confused about one thing, though. How the heck do you steal 26,000 pounds of wings?
|Oh, that explains it.|
"I don't do the guys. I don't do that. We don't have any gays on the team. They gotta get up outta here if they do. Can't be with that sweet stuff."In an angle uncovered by traditional media outlets, is it just me, or does that quote seem to suggest that Culliver is a closeted homosexual? I mean, there's no way to prove it, but who says "I don't do the guys" and that he "can't be with that sweet stuff"? That sounds like someone who'd really like to get with that sweet stuff but is forced to live a life of shame because of the bigotry that infests professional sports. Just a thought.
|He got into football just so he could openly wear pink in October.|